My book is now available to order!

The book is named after this blog, "A Mother's Tears, Poems of Heartbreak, Loss, and Discovery," and is available for ordering from
www.createspace.com/3471259
or
www.amazon.com/A-Mothers-Tears/dp/1453716947/

This unique and beautiful collection of poems, written from the depths of a mother's broken heart, will touch and comfort others suffering the most devastating loss of all, the death of a child. A year and a half after the tragic loss of her son, poetry started flowing through her. The release of her pain and anguish provided through this amazing outpouring helped facilitate her healing, and is offered here to help others heal. Giving words to a grief that has no words, she will touch your heart. Those suffering similar loss will find hope and strength in her poems.

Soul's Cry

My son’s always with me, yet physically gone,
Lord, give me the strength to draw upon,
I cannot do this by myself,
Surround me with heavenly help.

Lead me to the well inside,
Knowing love is the guide,
Quench the thirst that leaves me dry,
Answer my soul's cry.

Drinking deeply from the cup,
Refresh my soul and fill it up,
And with the sacred water of life,
Remove all torment and earthly strife.

Live from the Heart

Be in the world, but not of it, I have heard the phrase,
It’s now how I live my days,
Shakespeare had it right when he wrote,
“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women
merely players,” to quote.

Since you died my perception has changed,
I no longer live life in close range,
Now standing somewhat apart,
But striving to live from my heart.

Viewing life from a distance,
Praying for Heavenly assistance,
Surrendering into the flow,
I am learning to let go.

All things are possible with Divine love and aid,
Understanding and acceptance for the plan that was laid,
My heart is broken but I am trying my best,
To mend and recover from this grievous test.

No one fully understands the bond that we had,
Or why under the surface I always am sad,
There is never a minute that you are not missed,
My wonderful son and most treasured wish.

I loved you on earth and I love you in Heaven,
Love crosses all dimensions,
The ties of the heart are eternal and strong,
Connected forever within love’s bond.

Hands Held

My soul is screaming,
I am clawing at the door,
Please God, I know there is more,
What am I here for?

Remove the veils,
My spirit wails,
I want to be with my son,
I can’t lose our connection.

A life, a love, a joy divine,
Gone, what I thought was mine,
Hands held, faces kissed,
Oh God, so dearly missed.

Only borrowed, never owned,
Love, the pattern sown,
A kiss, a hug, a tender sigh,
I will never say goodbye.

So many questions, why God, why?
Will I have no answers until I die?
Help me to find what I seek,
Open my heart and give relief.

A hand held, yet released,
A heart, that can be at peace.

An Unknown Road

I long to know why I am here,
It would be wonderful for this to be clear,
No more fumbling around in the dark,
Feeling like my life is in park.

Shine the light so I might drive,
Feeling joy in being alive,
Time has been long and sober,
Ever since you crossed over.

No longer sure of my destination,
When life changed with no explanation,
I now travel an unknown road,
Please take from me this heavy load.

Show me that which I seek,
As I live week to week,
Searching for the inner core,
To feel love and light and joy once more.

Angels Close By

 When I hurt and when I cry,
I know my angels are close by,
I refocus and go within,
Receiving strength from Spirit again.

With my inner spiritual ear,
I listen for what I may hear,
Soft little echoes from my soul,
Aiding me in becoming more whole.

With these whispers from inside,
Loving thoughts that help and guide,
I find courage to stand on my own,
Comforted in knowing I’m never alone.

A Time to Die

I wish that I could have said goodbye,
Before you died,
Sometimes I imagine you as you fell,
A kind of hell.

I cannot go there,
Without deep despair,
 I force my mind to turn away,
To focus on all our other days.

You were happy walking,
On your cell phone talking,
To a good friend,
Shortly before your end.

You were sharing ideas about your art,
What you would start,
Plans, projects, your senior portfolio,
Which direction you would go.

Your last college year,
You were in high gear,
Full of ideas and dreams,
That you wanted to be seen.

If there is a time to die,
I am grateful that you passed on a high,
At the top of your game,
With no one to blame.

To know you were laughing and full of light,
Enjoying your walk on a beautiful night,
Helps me to know,
It was a positive way for you to go.

No pain, no disease,
In seconds you were free,
 I can imagine your surprise,
When you realized you had died.

We are all now on a different walk,
Not ever consciously sought,
But maybe part of a bigger plan,
We don't yet fully understand.

We suffer and we grieve,
But I believe,
That eventually we will see,
What we came here to do and be.

Seasons

Seasons come and seasons go,
Joy and sorrow we come to know,
Always carried by the tide,
Where do we choose to reside?

Protest, anger, push and pull,
Will we play the part of fool?
Or with dignity and grace,
Handle all we will face.

Believing there is a plan,
I strive to understand,
All the sorrow and the pain,
We experience on this earthly plane.

Happiness and joy are a part of life too,
I’ll never forget the moments we knew,
Remembering our love will help to sustain me,
You live forever in precious memory.

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray that I will find relief,
It’s too hard to live each day in grief,
Please God, help me find your peace.

It’s not easy living each day,
Now that my son has passed away,
A conflict because I feel him near,
Though physically he’s not here.

Maybe tonight I will see,
My son alive in a dream with me,
A glimpse back to our lives before,
He walked through Heaven’s door.

Or, perhaps unknowingly,
I am with him when I sleep,
Traveling with him to a different realm,
Where God’s joy and peace abound.

To find the bridge between his world and mine,
Is what I seek to find,
Take my hand and lead me there,
Help me to be more aware.

To know that separation isn’t true,
That I will always be one with you,
And with God’s love and Divine help,
I will realize my greater self.