Update on My Book

Amazon now has "search inside this book" active for my book - now people can browse inside like looking at it in a bookstore!

Amazon.com: A Mother's Tears: Poems of Heartbreak, Loss, and Discovery (9781453716946): Claire Ann Stevenson

A Master Plan

Do you believe in magic,
And that it can happen from something tragic,
That from the deepest misery,
We may gain a great victory?

Do you believe that our earthly skin,
Is only the vessel for our spirit within,
That our true self is not what we see,
And that we are a part of eternity?

The here and now is not the whole,
In the journey of a soul,
But it's hard to have the comprehension,
For soul contracts and multi-dimensions.

When we come here without conscious knowledge,
Of what our souls want to accomplish,
And when we experience heartache, death, and loss,
It's natural to question the cost.

What is my place in the universe,
There are times that seem can't get worse,
And yet we must ultimately trust,
That life is just.

To surrender our will,
To listen and be still,
So that we may hear our spirit song,
And know that we are where we belong.

I don't want to live a lukewarm life,
Trampled down from all the strife,
No big highs or no big lows,
Everything just the status quo.

Hopefully the day will come,
When once more I'll want to run,
To laugh and play in the rain,
No longer carrying so much pain.

A worthy goal to pursue,
Something I must work to do,
Free of regrets for what has passed,
Because there is only one thing that ever lasts.


That is love, and that I knew,
With the blessing that was you,
Help me focus on my life's gifts,
That in joy my soul may lift.

Let me be comforted and reassured,
That everything that we endure,
Has the touch of a Master hand,
And is all a part of a divine plan.

Prayers and Meditations

I ask you, God, for your gift of peace,
Take away my hopelessness and grief,
Guide me to the answers I seek,
So in Spirit’s arms I’ll find relief.

Surround me in your Heavenly embrace,
Comfort and support to help me face,
A future now unknown to me,
Not what I’d thought it would be.

Hear my prayers and meditations,
Take away all hesitations,
For a heart that is shattered and broken,
Send your love to heal and open.

I don’t want to live in fear,
Now that my son’s not physically here,
Or live each day in a degree of depression,
Wondering if this pain will lessen.

Life is hard, I can’t do it by myself,
Thank you for any Heavenly help,
With God’s grace and Divine inspiration,
I pray for spiritual transformation.

What Must Be

Dear God, I am on my knees,
Praying for this pain to cease,
What have I come here for?
My life is not as it was before.

Must we suffer in order to grow?
Is this the only way we can know,
The spirit that dwells within,
Our temporary earthly skin?

Fill the emptiness that is inside,
Walk with me by my side,
I cannot do this by myself,
I ask for all Heavenly help.

Enfold me in your arms of grace,
With divine love to replace,
The grief and sadness that live in me,
With acceptance of what must be.

Signs of Love

Communication doesn't stop,
When you have a loss,
It's not the same as living here,
But there are signs strong and clear.

Look around and be alert,
There is comfort for our hurt,
Our loved ones want us to know,
They didn't totally go.

Their form has changed,
But their love remains,
And they want us to know,
So there are signs they show.

A television that un-mutes itself,
A plate turned sideways on the shelf,
Flickering lights and mysterious telephone rings,
Are some of their favorite things.

 Tangible signs of continuity and love,
Proof that we are still thought of,
Wanting us to not feel so alone,
They make their presence known.

I am grateful for every sign,
And thank my loved one each time,
For the reminders of the love we knew,
And the healing I am being guided through.

My book is now available to order!

The book is named after this blog, "A Mother's Tears, Poems of Heartbreak, Loss, and Discovery," and is available for ordering from
www.createspace.com/3471259
or
www.amazon.com/A-Mothers-Tears/dp/1453716947/

This unique and beautiful collection of poems, written from the depths of a mother's broken heart, will touch and comfort others suffering the most devastating loss of all, the death of a child. A year and a half after the tragic loss of her son, poetry started flowing through her. The release of her pain and anguish provided through this amazing outpouring helped facilitate her healing, and is offered here to help others heal. Giving words to a grief that has no words, she will touch your heart. Those suffering similar loss will find hope and strength in her poems.

Soul's Cry

My son’s always with me, yet physically gone,
Lord, give me the strength to draw upon,
I cannot do this by myself,
Surround me with heavenly help.

Lead me to the well inside,
Knowing love is the guide,
Quench the thirst that leaves me dry,
Answer my soul's cry.

Drinking deeply from the cup,
Refresh my soul and fill it up,
And with the sacred water of life,
Remove all torment and earthly strife.

Live from the Heart

Be in the world, but not of it, I have heard the phrase,
It’s now how I live my days,
Shakespeare had it right when he wrote,
“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women
merely players,” to quote.

Since you died my perception has changed,
I no longer live life in close range,
Now standing somewhat apart,
But striving to live from my heart.

Viewing life from a distance,
Praying for Heavenly assistance,
Surrendering into the flow,
I am learning to let go.

All things are possible with Divine love and aid,
Understanding and acceptance for the plan that was laid,
My heart is broken but I am trying my best,
To mend and recover from this grievous test.

No one fully understands the bond that we had,
Or why under the surface I always am sad,
There is never a minute that you are not missed,
My wonderful son and most treasured wish.

I loved you on earth and I love you in Heaven,
Love crosses all dimensions,
The ties of the heart are eternal and strong,
Connected forever within love’s bond.

Hands Held

My soul is screaming,
I am clawing at the door,
Please God, I know there is more,
What am I here for?

Remove the veils,
My spirit wails,
I want to be with my son,
I can’t lose our connection.

A life, a love, a joy divine,
Gone, what I thought was mine,
Hands held, faces kissed,
Oh God, so dearly missed.

Only borrowed, never owned,
Love, the pattern sown,
A kiss, a hug, a tender sigh,
I will never say goodbye.

So many questions, why God, why?
Will I have no answers until I die?
Help me to find what I seek,
Open my heart and give relief.

A hand held, yet released,
A heart, that can be at peace.

An Unknown Road

I long to know why I am here,
It would be wonderful for this to be clear,
No more fumbling around in the dark,
Feeling like my life is in park.

Shine the light so I might drive,
Feeling joy in being alive,
Time has been long and sober,
Ever since you crossed over.

No longer sure of my destination,
When life changed with no explanation,
I now travel an unknown road,
Please take from me this heavy load.

Show me that which I seek,
As I live week to week,
Searching for the inner core,
To feel love and light and joy once more.

Angels Close By

 When I hurt and when I cry,
I know my angels are close by,
I refocus and go within,
Receiving strength from Spirit again.

With my inner spiritual ear,
I listen for what I may hear,
Soft little echoes from my soul,
Aiding me in becoming more whole.

With these whispers from inside,
Loving thoughts that help and guide,
I find courage to stand on my own,
Comforted in knowing I’m never alone.

A Time to Die

I wish that I could have said goodbye,
Before you died,
Sometimes I imagine you as you fell,
A kind of hell.

I cannot go there,
Without deep despair,
 I force my mind to turn away,
To focus on all our other days.

You were happy walking,
On your cell phone talking,
To a good friend,
Shortly before your end.

You were sharing ideas about your art,
What you would start,
Plans, projects, your senior portfolio,
Which direction you would go.

Your last college year,
You were in high gear,
Full of ideas and dreams,
That you wanted to be seen.

If there is a time to die,
I am grateful that you passed on a high,
At the top of your game,
With no one to blame.

To know you were laughing and full of light,
Enjoying your walk on a beautiful night,
Helps me to know,
It was a positive way for you to go.

No pain, no disease,
In seconds you were free,
 I can imagine your surprise,
When you realized you had died.

We are all now on a different walk,
Not ever consciously sought,
But maybe part of a bigger plan,
We don't yet fully understand.

We suffer and we grieve,
But I believe,
That eventually we will see,
What we came here to do and be.

Seasons

Seasons come and seasons go,
Joy and sorrow we come to know,
Always carried by the tide,
Where do we choose to reside?

Protest, anger, push and pull,
Will we play the part of fool?
Or with dignity and grace,
Handle all we will face.

Believing there is a plan,
I strive to understand,
All the sorrow and the pain,
We experience on this earthly plane.

Happiness and joy are a part of life too,
I’ll never forget the moments we knew,
Remembering our love will help to sustain me,
You live forever in precious memory.

Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray that I will find relief,
It’s too hard to live each day in grief,
Please God, help me find your peace.

It’s not easy living each day,
Now that my son has passed away,
A conflict because I feel him near,
Though physically he’s not here.

Maybe tonight I will see,
My son alive in a dream with me,
A glimpse back to our lives before,
He walked through Heaven’s door.

Or, perhaps unknowingly,
I am with him when I sleep,
Traveling with him to a different realm,
Where God’s joy and peace abound.

To find the bridge between his world and mine,
Is what I seek to find,
Take my hand and lead me there,
Help me to be more aware.

To know that separation isn’t true,
That I will always be one with you,
And with God’s love and Divine help,
I will realize my greater self.